The other day while sitting in my office after visiting with a friend of mine to discuss some personal changes he wanted to make in his life, one of our Recovery Coaches here at the Foundations for Recovery made the most interesting comment, “If you see a change that needs to be changed and don’t take the necessary steps to change it that’s not really changing”. I must admit I was not practicing my active listening skills by making direct eye contact with him but as soon as I heard this I immediately lifted up my head from staring at the computer and asked him to repeat what he said. Much to my surprise he actually remembered it and for that brief moment a pride came over me but then humility. The reason for the pride was that I know this young man’s past and the compulsive addictive behavior that had been in his life for years. How his life of drugs and alcohol caused so many others around him (including family) to change. His behavior caused those who loved him the most to distance themselves so that he could try to find his steps on his own.
Since taking over the position of Executive Director of the Foundations for Recovery after the passing of my dear friend and founder Steve Hale, I have seen and felt first-hand the pain, worry, anxiety, fear, depression, anger, tears and love not always from those seeking treatment from their addictive behavior, but rather from the loves ones of the addict or alcoholic that have had to experience it with them.
Webster’s Dictionary defines “Change” as follows:
Change – verb ‘chanj “to make radically different”
It is now going on 8 months in recovery for the young man that made this statement to me and I am thrilled that today he remains clean and sober. What has brought Nick to this place in Recovery? If you asked him he may give you the same answer I will tell you…..a “radical” step. That means old things (behavior, friends, places, attitudes, dress, speech, etc.) must pass away and a new radical step on the road of recovery must start.
So if you read this today and find yourself experiencing one of the emotions I wrote about then allow me to ask you this question. What needs to be changed? Do you have someone you know that is in the grip of their addiction? Do you find yourself wanting to help only to see no change in that person? Are you yourself struggling with addiction and wanting to stop but fearful you can’t? Then take the first step and come speak to one of our certified highly trained recovery coaches at the Foundations for Recovery.
As I noted earlier pride filled my heart when I heard Nick shared this thought with me but then humility in my own recovery came to me. Why? Because I have found that these two emotions either prevent us from seeking assistance over our addiction or become the reason we take that radical step to change. For you see it is PRIDE that keeps the addict or alcoholic from asking for help, but it is HUMILITY that brings them to the desire to change. This is the “radical step” we must start with on our new road to recovery
Be blessed my friends and as always be a blessing to others